Question 2 : Problems waking up

Dearest Aini,

I was reading the previous posts, and I also have a question of my own. It also happens to be sleep related. You see, I have trouble waking up in the morning. Well, a LOT of trouble. Here's a typical school morning:

6:00 AM: My alarm clock begins to ring.
6:05 AM: Everybody in the house has woken up becoz of my alarm clock. I am still sleeping.
6:10 AM: My mum tries to wake me up... results are similar to trying to wake up a wood block.
6:20 AM: I finally come out of my coma, realise that the alarm is ringing, and turn off the alarm clock.
6:25 AM: I go back to sleep.
6:30 AM: Zzzzz
7:00 AM: Zzzzz
7:30 AM: Zzzzz
8:00 AM: Zzzzz

Do you have any advice on this problem of mine?

-Sleeping Handsome

Dear Sleeping Handsome,

Well, I am sure you are not the only person sharing this problem, certainly many people do face it especially my brother.

I am afraid to say, this problem may not be solved overnight. The usual thing most people would tell you to do is well, to sleep early I mean real early like 9 or 10 o'clock. That should help you awake on time. But i dont think that this is the problem and shall elaborate later.

Anyway, secondly, you could get your mother to do the tried-and-tested bucket-o-water thing. This is done by pouring a bucket (yes, a glass will not do). This will ensure that you wake up but have a different case of bed-wetting, unlike the usual peeing, everytime u wake up.

However, I have noticed that environmental changes are also reflected in dreams. You might dream of drowning and may possibly drown in your dream. I do not know what will happen next hence I recommend exercising caution when you do this.

Thirdly, you could get a sleeptracker, if you have that much money to spend that is. You can get it from http://www.sleeptracker.com . I personally have not tried it and am neither sure of its efficacy nor the way it works.

Fourthly, you could sleep on the floor. That will ensure that you do not sleep like a baby and will not encourage you to laze around.

And of course, if you live in a forested neighbourhood, you could sleep on a tree. If your not careful, you'll certainly fall off and that will wake you up.

I would suggest that u evaluate what exactly is keeping u from waking up on time. like, assess how u feel when u wake up. do u feel extremely exhausted (presumably from your nightly activities)? also, do u look dread wads going to come if u wake up on time? like... u know, u have to wake up early just to go to school and if u hate school, that may be the reason why u cant seem to wake up on time. or do u sleep too much? or are u not sleeping enough? these questions can only be answered by you, yourself, and by this self examination u can probably figure out wads wrong.

or maybe you just have a high inertia- a high reluctance to change your state of motion i.e. state of unconsciousness. then, i am afraid that there is no easy solution for you sleeping handsome.

I hope this helps you sleepy head.

Yours truly,
Aunty Aini

ps. on a lighter note, perhaps u should get a 'princess charming' to help you in your mission.

Question 1 : Sleep-related problem

Dear Aini,

Many a times people complain their day goes bad when they wake up on the wrong side of the bed. For me its worse. I sleep on the floor, I wake up on the bed and my day is absolutely hell. What should I do?

Your truly,
needHelpPlease

hi there,

well, u do seem to have a very queer problem. i mean, how does one get from the floor to the bed? (however, i dont think that your hell-ish day is due to this problem)

first we will analise the source of this problem. you.

lets examine how u could have gone from the floor to the bed. there are three situations, of course. one: YOU did it subconciously and/or u have a very serious memory problem. two: someone did it, carrying u onto the bed when u were sleeping. and last but not least, somehow, your floor is higher than ur bed.

yup. is that true?

lets take a look at this diagram

the setting is somewhat weird, but this is a weird problem. this setting can be accomplished if u had phua chu kang for your renovator and thus, u now have very uneven floor. or u are living in a multiple-storey house with a bed at the bottom of your stairs. or quite simply, u are living in an attic. if u are in any of this situation, then, this problem is not really a problem.
rather, u would want to thank your lucky stars you did not hurt yourself while plunging down such a height in your sleep. or roll out the window, since your house already has a very weird layout.

as for option two, i.e. someone carrying you onto the bed while you were asleep, u would have to assess yourself. one:how old are u? two:wad size are u? if u are a kid, it is very likely that your parents did it. if not, well, a spouse? also, the likelihood of your being carried by your parents would decrease greatly if u are equivalent in size to Patrick Starr. also, please cleanse your house of any stray beings to prevent this from happening again.. the beings in question are of course some intangible entities that have made their prescence known to you in their episode. poltergeists can do greater harm then just replacing u about the house when u are, well, asleep.

if all of the above is not applicable, then the source of the problem is option one. you. yep. you could be sleep walking or sumting, so i suggest the next time u go to sleep, ask a family member or roomate to look out for such stuff. if not, set up a video cam to tape your nightly activities, and u will know how u got onto the bed without your own knowledge.

if all these do not work... well.. there is only one solution.

sleep on the bed next time.

have a nice day

love,
aunty aini