Dear Aini

this place certainly is dead

2005-09-26T05:40:00.000-07:00

not for lack of enthusiasm on my part anyway. i am just bursting to impart my vast knowledge onto the lands of merrydew. oh well. till we meet again at another time and place, tata!

and keep those queries coming in...

Aunty Aini

Question 6: Question needs answering

2005-06-25T02:02:00.000-07:00

Dear Aunty Aini

I have a question my GP teacher set me that's got me puzzling for days...

In this present world where it is impossible not to be constantly informed, if your child would be inevitably exposed to violence or sex, which would be worse?

Can you help me with this riddle?

Yours faithfully,
Confused

Dear Confused,

I suspect that this is an essay question posed by your GP teacher, but we shall try answering it to cure your poor little head from this eville riddle! (geez, that rhymes)

Violence. Sex. These are two very evil things indeed. In fact, there are very little things that i can think of that are more evil than these two. Lets draw a table of consequences. (i love drawing)

Here we are....

Now, my dear Confused, it all depends on what kind of parent you are. And what kind of child you have. You see, this is a topic so diverse that i may have to write a book on this.

To put it simply....

When your child is exposed to violence, he/she may have a tendency to use violence or will learn to avoid it. You can choose to expose him/her to the wonders of violence or you can choose to tell him/her about the evils of violence.

When you child is exposed to sex, it really depends on what aspect of sex he/she is exposed to. If he/she learns that 'sex is great!', then, well, happy grandparents day to you!
If he/she learns that a sexual relationship can lead to social collaspe and serious STDs and Death and all things terrible, then u should be able to welcome a celibate into your home.
But, if he/she learns that sex is to be shared between two consenting adults who are committed to each other in a legal agreement, i.e. marriage, to secure that tie, well, then, its a different matter altogether ain't it?

The thing is, its not WHAT your child is exposed to. Its HOW he/she is exposed to it. Supposing that you, as a parent, will educate your child to the best of capabilities and have a loving and peaceful relationship with your kid, you shouldn't worry much about this.

ps: i dont think this will be a big issue. look at the population statistics... it tells a colourful story...

Love,
Aunty Aini.

Question 5: Pessismist?

2005-04-17T06:52:00.000-07:00

Dear Auntie Aini,

Why is it that whenever I think of something good happening to me, it
turns out to be well, just a fantasy? I mean, it never happened for
real and how I really wish it does, but nah, I always get
disappointed. What's wrong with me? Am I cursed?

Thank You and have a good day.

Always,
cerified day-dreamer chick.

Dear cerified day-dreamer chick,

my, wad a long name u have.

i tink u are going thru karmic retribution. to stop this vicious cycle, do good.

Good Luck!

Aunty Aini

(added on 21/april.)
maybe, u need to take a more proactive attitude in life. you know, a man can wait for an apple to drop down by waiting under an apple tree. but usually, the monkeys will get to the apples first. along with the other animals and insects. when u get an apple, if u ever get one, u get a terrible one, probably all bitten and rotten.

moral of the story? go get the apple, man. you can wish all u want but if u dont do anything about it, u will not get it. to win stuff in a lucky draw, you MUST have bought a product or done something to get it, in the first place.

i hope that u got the idea. go for what u wish for. strive for what u want.

still remember karmic retribution. help everyone....

Question 4: PMSing

2005-04-13T20:40:00.000-07:00

Dear Aini,

I seem to PMS every other day. I get easily irritated by people. At chatterboxes on my blog, everyone complains my blog isn't worth reading because its filled by rantings, complaints against others and shouting. I am fast losing my friends. The doc says there's nothing wrong with me. He just looks at me and says, that I am not suffering from PMS. However, I know that I am.

Yours truly,
GuyInTrouble

Dear GuyInTrouble,

you may be experiencing andropause

pause.

pause.

kidding.

anyway, i think you should reflect on your life now. are u experiencing heightened stress? depending on the demands of ur life, i am sure that u can find the reason for your quick-tempered-ness. for me, yes, there are certain times of the month when everyone just seems to become stupid all of the sudden.

anyway, your friends' complaints about your blog are nonsensical. of course your blog is suppose to be full of rants and complaints. wad else can u write about? i feel that a blog is supposed to record wad u think, not a day-to-day account of ur daily events.

And, if u are a guy, how can u possibly have PMS? it stands for pre-menstrual syndrome, so unless u bled in between your legs a few days after ur outbursts, it is not right to call it PMS. and u guys dont know how lucky u are to not experience this mood swings. because its part of our life. wait till u experience a mood swing of the pregnant kind.
then... may God have mercy upon your soul.

to remedy this problem, (it could just be genetics though) you should learn to let go a little, perhaps take a break in between stuff. i am sure that with a more relaxed mind, u can stop urself from lunging at someone's throat at the slightest of irritation.

or, u could bring a 'air hammer' the sort that u blow up and hit the irritator with. i believe it wil release some of the pent up emotions and i tink u will feel slightly better.

i hope this has helped. cheers to you!

Aunty Aini

update: u could also check out PMT on google. i just found out it happens to males too. (because of the *snag* phenomenon, i suppose)

Question 3: Energy Level Problem

2005-03-30T19:02:00.000-08:00

Dear Aunty Aini,

I have a serious problem with my sleeping habits. Each day I wake up at 6am feeling groggy as hell, feel awake only around lunch after dozing through my lessons, doze again through my CCA practices then stay up all night using the computer into the wee hours of the morning. It's affecting my academic life so I would really appreciate it if you could help me.

Yours sincerely,
Zzzzzz

Dear Zzzzzz,

The first thing you need to do is get a nicer life. I can't believe you can actually stand waking up at six in the morning every single day of your life, and wake up only to eat lunch and use the computer. Geez, what are ya, a geek?

...Oh. You meant school days. Of course.

Well, Zzzzzz, you'll be glad to know that your habits are perfectly normal... almost. Scientists have proven that people's energy levels usually peak during noon and evening and reach all-time lows upon just waking up, the afternoon and of course, at night. Your case simply happens to be slightly more severe in the sense that your energy levels drop so much you drop off.

My first piece advice to you is to get someone to copy your notes for you. Your CCA may be a problem since you can't possibly ask your friends to sing your songs or play ball for you. You could ask your friend to rudely jab you in the sides when they think your eyelids are getting heavy. It worked for me! Just be warned, this method does have its side-effects. Your friends may find this method of awakening addictive. You could end up staying awake through the day, catching up with whatever information necessary, but you could also end up having agonising pain in the sides. Oh well, you win some, you lose some.

As for your computer using habits, scientists have also proven that the body's energy level is weakest during late nights and early mornings, especially the immune system. As a result phenomena like death and heart attacks are more frequent then. Just thought you might like to know.

on the other hand. just go to sleep earlier and your problem will be solved.

Love,
Aunty Aini

Question 2 : Problems waking up

2005-03-26T21:10:00.000-08:00

Dearest Aini,

I was reading the previous posts, and I also have a question of my own. It also happens to be sleep related. You see, I have trouble waking up in the morning. Well, a LOT of trouble. Here's a typical school morning:

6:00 AM: My alarm clock begins to ring.
6:05 AM: Everybody in the house has woken up becoz of my alarm clock. I am still sleeping.
6:10 AM: My mum tries to wake me up... results are similar to trying to wake up a wood block.
6:20 AM: I finally come out of my coma, realise that the alarm is ringing, and turn off the alarm clock.
6:25 AM: I go back to sleep.
6:30 AM: Zzzzz
7:00 AM: Zzzzz
7:30 AM: Zzzzz
8:00 AM: Zzzzz

Do you have any advice on this problem of mine?

-Sleeping Handsome

Dear Sleeping Handsome,

Well, I am sure you are not the only person sharing this problem, certainly many people do face it especially my brother.

I am afraid to say, this problem may not be solved overnight. The usual thing most people would tell you to do is well, to sleep early I mean real early like 9 or 10 o'clock. That should help you awake on time. But i dont think that this is the problem and shall elaborate later.

Anyway, secondly, you could get your mother to do the tried-and-tested bucket-o-water thing. This is done by pouring a bucket (yes, a glass will not do). This will ensure that you wake up but have a different case of bed-wetting, unlike the usual peeing, everytime u wake up.

However, I have noticed that environmental changes are also reflected in dreams. You might dream of drowning and may possibly drown in your dream. I do not know what will happen next hence I recommend exercising caution when you do this.

Thirdly, you could get a sleeptracker, if you have that much money to spend that is. You can get it from http://www.sleeptracker.com . I personally have not tried it and am neither sure of its efficacy nor the way it works.

Fourthly, you could sleep on the floor. That will ensure that you do not sleep like a baby and will not encourage you to laze around.

And of course, if you live in a forested neighbourhood, you could sleep on a tree. If your not careful, you'll certainly fall off and that will wake you up.

I would suggest that u evaluate what exactly is keeping u from waking up on time. like, assess how u feel when u wake up. do u feel extremely exhausted (presumably from your nightly activities)? also, do u look dread wads going to come if u wake up on time? like... u know, u have to wake up early just to go to school and if u hate school, that may be the reason why u cant seem to wake up on time. or do u sleep too much? or are u not sleeping enough? these questions can only be answered by you, yourself, and by this self examination u can probably figure out wads wrong.

or maybe you just have a high inertia- a high reluctance to change your state of motion i.e. state of unconsciousness. then, i am afraid that there is no easy solution for you sleeping handsome.

I hope this helps you sleepy head.

Yours truly,
Aunty Aini

ps. on a lighter note, perhaps u should get a 'princess charming' to help you in your mission.

Question 1 : Sleep-related problem

2005-03-23T01:35:00.000-08:00

Dear Aini,

Many a times people complain their day goes bad when they wake up on the wrong side of the bed. For me its worse. I sleep on the floor, I wake up on the bed and my day is absolutely hell. What should I do?

Your truly,
needHelpPlease

hi there,

well, u do seem to have a very queer problem. i mean, how does one get from the floor to the bed? (however, i dont think that your hell-ish day is due to this problem)

first we will analise the source of this problem. you.

lets examine how u could have gone from the floor to the bed. there are three situations, of course. one: YOU did it subconciously and/or u have a very serious memory problem. two: someone did it, carrying u onto the bed when u were sleeping. and last but not least, somehow, your floor is higher than ur bed.

yup. is that true?

lets take a look at this diagram

the setting is somewhat weird, but this is a weird problem. this setting can be accomplished if u had phua chu kang for your renovator and thus, u now have very uneven floor. or u are living in a multiple-storey house with a bed at the bottom of your stairs. or quite simply, u are living in an attic. if u are in any of this situation, then, this problem is not really a problem.
rather, u would want to thank your lucky stars you did not hurt yourself while plunging down such a height in your sleep. or roll out the window, since your house already has a very weird layout.

as for option two, i.e. someone carrying you onto the bed while you were asleep, u would have to assess yourself. one:how old are u? two:wad size are u? if u are a kid, it is very likely that your parents did it. if not, well, a spouse? also, the likelihood of your being carried by your parents would decrease greatly if u are equivalent in size to Patrick Starr. also, please cleanse your house of any stray beings to prevent this from happening again.. the beings in question are of course some intangible entities that have made their prescence known to you in their episode. poltergeists can do greater harm then just replacing u about the house when u are, well, asleep.

if all of the above is not applicable, then the source of the problem is option one. you. yep. you could be sleep walking or sumting, so i suggest the next time u go to sleep, ask a family member or roomate to look out for such stuff. if not, set up a video cam to tape your nightly activities, and u will know how u got onto the bed without your own knowledge.

if all these do not work... well.. there is only one solution.

sleep on the bed next time.

have a nice day

love,
aunty aini